My mum and I are completely different people; she likes winter, I like summer, she prefers black tea, I like to add milk and sugar to mine. In a nutshell, we never agree on anything.
This used to frustrate me a lot. I started to believe that I could never talk to her about anything.
My friends would tell me about how they can talk to their mums about things I wouldn’t dare bring up with mine - like relationships and school, I felt like she just wouldn’t get it.
I got along well with my aunt though. So one day I spoke to her about my challenging relationship with my mum. To my surprise, she told me that my mum felt the same way; she wanted to be closer to me but she wasn’t sure how to approach me and talk to me about things like boyfriends and school work.
My aunt advised me to plan a special day for me and my mum where we could bond. She explained to me that if I wanted to get close with my mum I should:
- Speak to her in a friendly and respectable manner. Think through what I want to get from the conversation and make sure I listen to her opinion when she speaks too.
- Plan to have a chat when it will just be me and her in the house. That way I will have her full attention without distractions from others.
- Do something that we’ll both enjoy, like watching our favourite TV show or working in the garden. This will help to break down any barriers and make the conversation flow easier.
Relieved, I went back home and started putting my aunt's advice into action. I planned a date in the house for just me and my mum. We spent the following Saturday bonding and now I feel more comfortable talking to my mum about anything.
I’m so glad I asked my aunt for advice that day because now my mother is my favourite person in the world.